Archives for the 'funnies' Category
Momma Rumsfeld…
… aims for the toodles. (the linked video is not safe for work due to the page’s other loaded content; the video itself however is just wholesome grandma goodness)
the fonz honk
I can’t choose how to intro this, so I’m giving you options; just remember the one you like:
- From the diaphragm. Aaay!
- I know a family of geese in need of some assistance.
- The uber cool boy who cried honk.
- Well, if Henry Winkler likes it…
- Who’s safe, and has two thumbs? This […]
best blonde joke ever
I’m not usually into blonde jokes, but I came across what may be the the best blonde joke ever.
You’re welcome.
little Richy Someday learns ebonics
Richard Someday, - Richy to everybody but his pasty-white, Catholically-strict, horribly uncool parents - a boy of about ten, had math every day with his arch nemesis, Flexisoft Vanilla; Flexi-lexy they called her.
Richy was in love, and had been from day one; butterfly, shooting star, penny in a wishing well, puddle-jump goodness. Why was […]
the cat learns about crazy bitches
preface: Any story I have opening with the phrase “so I was watching MTV” is bound to be a good one, but the idiocy of the content may offend some. With that…
So, I was watching MTV, one of those dating shows. Some loon, apparently the object of five or so women’s undying affections, […]
swamp thing lives in SF
Dash ate my last set of headphones, the set I had come to enjoy more than any other I’ve had. It has been a couple of weeks since I’ve been able to listen to my ipod on the go, and so today I broke down and made a trip to Walgreen’s on a headphone […]
God’s either a woman or a little fruity
Consider this, colors in the world usually match. You’d be hard pressed to find a landscape with both dark red and bright orange; you might find a sunset with a varying spectrum of red and orange, each bleeding into the next every so carefully and gently, but that’s ok because each color is next […]
the seventh day
Before we get started, we have to have an understanding of the assumptions:
- God exists
- God did spend six days working on creation
- God did rest on the seventh day
- God is a man (generally speaking women are the smarter sex, so keeping God male will make this post funnier)
With that out of the way, […]
there’s a big market for good hyperbolic simile
I was watching the Discovery Channel earlier - some show about stunt nuts. This guy was going to swoop down out of the sky (from a sky dive) and fly through a hanger, in the hopes of landing safely on the opposite side. The quote the tv host used to describe the stunt? […]
Bill O’Reilly on the Colbert Report
Classic television on tonight; makes me glad I’ve got a reason to stay up tonight. Some excerpts (not exact, but I’m completely fair to the meaning as I understand it; um, yeah)…
~someone in the crowd boo-ing~
O’Reilly: Do you hear that? Do you hear that boo-ing?
Colbert: No, no, that’s bear calling. They’re calling […]